First, since nobody's pointed it out, you use "their" at one point where you should use "there."

I found the part about conversational topics amusing. As others have pointed out, it of course isn't really true, but it's still funny, and it was well-written.

After that, the essay was fine, but I did think it got a little more cliched, so I would recommend taking krellin's advice and working on coming up with more creative examples/behaviors. You could also work in a story or two -- instead of just talking in generalities, put in an anecdote (but work hard to make it funny, not just bitter/sad).

I don't agree with a lot of what's been said. But in general, if you want to safely avoid such reactions and still write funny things, a good way is to be self-deprecating. For example, if you wrote a piece from the perspective of somebody who clearly wasn't popular but thought he was (while demonstrating otherwise), then it would still be funny, but since the humor would be self-directed, people would not find it bitter.

Here is some writing that manages to be pretty humorous without coming off as unpleasantly critical:

http://www.gutenberg.org/files/18934/18934-h/18934-h.htm