I think you're reading too much into it. People refuse to pause for a variety of reasons. In one game I'm in, the person who is presently my biggest ally was the only person to refuse a pause I requested earlier in the game, because he simply does not like pausing games, period. I can respect that.

why do you respect that? if someone simply does not like drawing, do you respect that? is that reasonable? what if someone has a good reason? i dont think not liking to pause deserves respect without a valid reason. the only reason someone would not like it is if they got screwed previously from pauses in which case they should contact a mod

What if they like the games to progress in the fashion that everyone agreed to when they started?

I'm not even considering emergencies or accidents in this game, those would take some seriously twisted moral fiber to not pause for them. But in a game where someone says "hey guys, I'm going on a cruise and don't want to be bothered with diplomacy, let's pause k?" and he's been my enemy all game? Fuck that, you shouldn't have joined a game if you knew you were going on a cruise and can't be bothered to get a sitter.

I pause for CDs to get a replacement. And I pause for emergencies, accidents, and last minute problems. But if you wait until the last day to tell people about your vacation, you have no rights to expect a pause. Sitters fix this and more people should use them.

Now, having said that, I usually pause. But the whole point of this discussion was about if it would give you the win.

And I'm just going to go out and say it, I once refused to pause over Christmas to break a stalemate. And I won the game. And the stalemate began to form sometime in October.

"He who is prudent and lies in wait for an enemy who is not, will be victorious."

I'm just curious at where others draw the line.

It's an interesting discussion.

When I first came to the site, having played lots of FTF, Pausing was a completely alien concept. When someone asked for a Pause in my first game, I couldn't understand why someone would sign up for a game and then go on holiday for a week. I was tempted to take advantage, just as if it had been no-holds-barred FTF.

I then asked a few people who had played here alot longer, and realised that agreeing to Pauses is just part of the convention on WebDip. So I agreed to my first Pause and found that the game worked better. My main preference is to do well with a full set of players, rather than taking advantage of drop outs and CDs.

To me, it is the "infinity" aspect of the pause, or at least the potential to need a moderator to restart the game. Like going to the teacher to resolve a dispute; seems childish. I think pauses would be more acceptable if there were a preset time limit. While it could be a programmng nightmare, would it make it more useful if the pause were for 1-day, 5-day or 7-day etc? Seems like a solvable problem with drop-down menus but I am unsure of the true feasability. It would make pausing more stomachable if it didn't give so much power over the fate of the game out to a unanimous decision making model among "strangers " or the potential need to goto a higher power.

Refusing to pause is unacceptably bad behavior (except for live games obviously - where pauses are ruled out by design).

You can get a mod to unpause, so there's no risk at all, no 'infinity'.

Personally, I've not seen anyone refuse a pause in a while and would definitely refuse to play with them again, regardless of what lame excuse they will come up with.

im having that problem right now. a player in one of my games is refusing to pause. he has no lame excuse. simply: i do not pause.

Find a sitter!

who? i play many anonymous games so what if the sitter is playing another country in the same game? i dont really know anyone who could sit for me and i dont want to hand my account over to a stranger. and lastly i dont prefer someone playing for me

I just think its important to understand that no player is required to pause. I'm sitting for a player now who contacted me several days before he had to leave so we were able to talk about strategies and the game histories.

I think its a mistake to play completely anonymous games where you have no idea who's in the game, but if required, a mod could help make sure there's no conflict of interest.

And really, in this day and age, only emergencies and accidents should keep someone from being able to access free wifi once a day.

@Geofram - maybe where you live there is free wifi on every block. But some people live in the rural areas where free wifi doesn't exist at all.

and how does this sitter thing work? you give someone your password and they log in as you?

And your assumption also assumes they have mobile computing. Mind, I have two laptops and a cell phone, so I'm not talking about me. But some people don't have te budget for all the toys others of us have. Just as you can't afford the owner's suite on a royale caribbean cruise, they can't afford a laptop and cell phone with unlimited data plan.

@red squirrel - yes. Change your password to something for the sitter, then chqnge it again when you get back.

thank you draugnar. everyone assumes free wifi means no excuses.
@Geo: did you suggest getting a sitter to the guy you took advantage of over christmas? :)

@Draug: yea i thought of that but what if the sitter changes the new password and highjacks your account. i suppose the mods would have to step in, but they do not respond instantaneously and someone could cause serious damage to your account. i.e. joining a bunch of games and losing or resigning in all of them.

Just a comment. Some of you have played in games with me and know that I have a rule against pausing. Paused 3 times in my time on the site and none of those was a good experience. First of all, I understand emergencies, but then again, we understood mail strikes in Italy back in the PBM days. I don't recall any pause asked or granted. I find it completely unacceptable that players start a game with a short time frame, say 24 or 36 hours knowing they are going somewhere about 05 and complaining because i don't want to vote pause for a week. McD, Starbucks, hotels, bookstores, homes, and other places have internet. Pauses are a gift and some of them seem to feel they are entitled. They whyne and complain and make rude comments. Then they act like you are the bad guy for not granting just the way the guy stealing your car is upset when you don't want him to. My theory is that you join the game and play to the end or don't join. I say no pauses, ever.

By the way, Red Squirrel's lame excuse for the pause is that he's going on a trip. Either way, no need to grant it. Sorry Red, think about your schedule a little before you join games.

@Red: No, but he could have easily found one. And there has never been a case of someone offering to sit and then screwing with someone.
@Draug: Public libraries cost no money. Nor do best buys, and other electronic shops.

@Red Squirrel - Be careful who you allow to sit. Pick people with a solid site reputation who wouldn't want to deal with the aftermath of probably getting banned for pulling stunts like you describe.

@BESM - I'll defend you right not to pause, but it should be pointed out that the rules have changed since someone refused to unpause, forced a draw, then bragged about it here on the forum.

@BESM - it is obvious that you are the player in my game. as i said in global in the game: i dont feel entitled to the pause, i wasnt complaining, i merely asked and you refused. i also dont feel my comments were rude (if you were referring to our game). i also didnt come to the forum to whine. notice i didnt make this thread im just debating pauses here because it is directly related to my current situation. when i joined the game i wasnt thinking about a business trip in a couple weeks. i dont think that far ahead which isnt your fault. in fact it didnt even occur to me that i would need a pause until 2 days ago. but what if my company suddenly decided to send me on a trip to somewhere without internet at all. thats not an emergency, but is that acceptable for you? i was really trying to be reasonable but as you said i will have to solve the problem :)

also i have never asked for pause before. now i know your policy BESM. wll keep that in mind

@Red Squirrel - If your company is sending you on trips, surely you are in the position to have a smart phone that can either access the internet as I'm doing now or can be tethered and provide your laptop access.

But, that said, I would be willing to sit for you.

its not like that. im an intern so i do not yet have a smart phone. im going to a conference in vegas so when im not doing business stuff i will want to be doing other things besides checking orders. it doesnt take long to check orders but i get really into diplomacy so i take longer than just entering moves.

i did not claim this to be an emergency but this is a huge opportunity for me and i wanted to focus fully without distractions so the pause would be very nice. i was very apologetic in all my games because i realize they are annoying but most people were obliging. i will consider the sitter but i may be able to figure something out. thanks Draug

The question is... Did you know about this trip when you were starting some of your current games? If you did you should not have started them.

I think we'd have a lot less players if that was the norm. Some games can last several months, its unrealistic to expect players to be available every day for that length of time. I think in most cases, asking players for a pause way ahead of time can let you know if you need to find a sitter. But if you refuse to accept a sitter, you need to be prepared to log on.

Now, in the case of emergencies, I think there are only a few players that would refuse to offer the pause. And I don't agree with them.