ya heres what two toher people had to say about it
1
I was in the college Ministry.
Now, I would not classify Xenos as a cult per se, but in the college group at least, I saw quite a few cultlike elements in the social structure that the church structure fed. Let me take you on a journey. I will probably tip my identity in sharing this, but I am not too concerned with that.
I moved to Columbus Ohio in the fall of 1996. I was lonely, immature, and depressed, although at the time I would not have said it as such. It was not long till an acquaintance of mine told me about this meeting in one of the dorm study rooms where a bunch of Christians were having a discussion group. At first, I was against it, but he enticed me with the prospect of attractive young females. Being a young man of 18, I went of course.
Over the next few weeks, I became a regular attendee, debating points of the Christian faith, and giving the arguments that were presented to me more creedance than they were worth, for at the time I was not trained to spot logical fallacies. To an impressionable mind, they made extraordinary claims, claims of God’s perfect love, perfect justice and whatnot. Growing up in a blue collar catholic family, I ate this stuff up.
Meanwhile, my class attendance started slipping. I had a lot of evening classes, but was encouraged to attend first CT, and then a homechurch, both while skipping out on classes. My grades plummeted.
Now I do realize I had a choice here, I could have stuck to my studies, and surely my life would have been easier for it, but I was confused, empty, a lost soul, and one of the promises Xenos made to me about God is that with the spirit, you are no longer empty.
I accepted Christ on easter of 1997. A week later I was kicked out of school for failing to meet the conditions of my academic probation.
Now, I am grateful for what came next. Xenos took me in, provided a couch to sleep on till I got a job and an apartment, and when my sublet was up, moved me into a ministry house. By this time, I was attending a homechurch, CT, a cell group, along with myriad prayer meetings.
I was on a spiritual high at the time. I was learning all I could about God, about Christianity, and looking back was starting to be groomed for leadership. My house and homechurch leaders started referring to “when I would be a leader”.
Meanwhile, I was still as depressed and as empty as ever. When I talked about this with other xenoids, I was told to keep to the path, God would sort it out.
I also started seeing things that sat very uneasily with me. All other Christian sects were bashed to one form or another, but particularly Catholics, Jehova Witnesses, and to a lesser extant, Mormons. I won’t even go into the venom reserved for non-Christian religions.
I started missing meetings due to work, or just being too depressed to leave the house. One hear or there did not merit comment, but if you missed more than three in a month, leaders started coming to you to voice thier concerns for your spiritual walk.
Finally, a few weeks before Christmas of 1998, things came to a head. I had been neglecting some of my house chores for a few weeks (as had other members of the house, but I was singled out it seems) and was put on probabtion. No missed chores for a month or I was outs. Three days before the month was up, I had been out late with friends seeing a movie, and forgot to do some cleaning. I did it first thing in the morning, but the house leaders decided to make me leave. At first, they wanted me out immediately. I managed to get a whole week out of them.
Needless to say, a week later I was homeless. I was crushed. Everything I had built my adult life around was suddenly gone. I had no friends outside of the church, as outside friends were not forbidden, but they were not encouraged unless they were outreach. My only support network was two hours away, so I went home to my parents.
The next year and a half were hard. I was removed from any support network, and was slowly slipping into darkness. Only a handful of people kept up with me, I would thank them, but all but one have left that group.
I moved back to Columbus in mid 2000, a mental wreck. Like an abused spouse, I went back to the only thing I knew, Xenos. I puttered on for about 7 or 8 months, never regaining the acceptance I had enjoyed previously. I was a fringe member, and outsider. Being on the edge I saw the truly bad aspects of that group. The cliquishness, the social control wielded over members, the selective enforcement of morality and the unhealthy focus on “Sexual Sin”.
My end with the group came with a woman. We started dating, and she was not Christian. I tried to bring her around at first, but she was offended at the groups attitudes towards other religions. We ended up having sex. Knowing I was violating Xonos’ rules, I removed myself from the group. However, that was not enough. Even though I had left of my own accord, they still instituted their church discipline against me, and the few friends I still had in the group were forbidden from speaking to me “For my own good”.
It was the best thing that ever happened to me.
Since then, I broke away from the false promises of my faith, and found my own way. I conquered my depression, have built true, lasting friendships, and have finally gotten my life back on track, all the things Xenos tells you are not possible without God, with the undertone that to be right with God you must be right with Xenos. Looking back, I see the broken people they pulled into their group, and some have gon on to lead rich, fulfilling lives, I can honestly say as of my last check, there were not that many in the college group that were.
I have overcome any resentment I had towards that group, a process that took many years. Through it I have become a better person, and in a way, am glad they treated me the way they did. I would not be the person I am today without Xenos.
I just hope for all those that go to them listening to false promises of fulfillment and meaning in their life, that they find what they are looking for.
!@#$%^&*(*&^%$#@#$%^&*(*&^%$#@#$%^&*(&^%$#@#$%^&*(*&^%$#
2
I was raised in a Lutheran Christian church and have always considered myself a strong christian. I started going to Xenos my freshman year of highschool (about 6 years ago) with some good friends. At first I loved it. It was exciting, new, and like the others posted here, it was a great time to learn about God and eachother. That was all great until some other things started happening gradually.
For some reason they began introducing the idea that dating is not a good thing for growth in God. I was told not to sit next to or talk to my boyfriend at the time while at any Xenos functions.
Next, I confided in one “leader” as they call them, that my father was an alcoholic. They told me I should cut off all communication with them.
They began to introduce more and more activities throughout the week to keep us busy. Homechurch(tuesdays), thursday night prayer group, CT (Sunday nights), something else on Monday nights that I don’t quite remember. Who has time for school or family when they have Xenos? That’s the idea I guess. If I wasn’t there for some reason on a Tuesday night, for example, I was cornered and questioned by a “leader” about it. The times spent at these meetings slowly got further and further away from the central and pure messages of God’s word, and closer and closer to the ideals that Xenos created. On there website they have a disclaimer stating that they are not a cult. In my opinion, if the church website has to make a disclaimer saying they are not a cult – then something is wrong here. You tell me.
I was suddenly trapped in, sucked in, and slowly watching all of my friends disappearing into this so-called “church.”
I finally got out. One night I made the decision to get out, to not have contact with any “leaders” and to not let myself feel guilty about anything. The important thing was my relationship with God – not with Xenos.
A couple of my friends have since left,one of which chose to leave after the church did not agree in her choice of a boyfriend and some other things along with that and told her she would either have to sign a contract saying she would change her ways and read it aloud before the whole church or be kicked out. Unfortunately though, the majority are still trapped in living in Ministry Houses together. I don’t know if they’ll ever get out to tell you the truth, and that scares me.
I’m not trying to bash the church. The ideas that they present at first are great, really appealing and they are very welcoming. Sometimes though, we have to be aware of what lies beneath. Many parents, etc. worry that this church may be a cult and Xenos “leaders” are quick to dismiss these accusations with humor and sarcasm….the fact is though, that sometimes humor and sarcasm are a good way to deal with uncomfortable accusations, and may not always be an honest response.
Just be safe out there when looking for a church. I would not recommend Xenos. Every church has faults, yes, but a church should not be controlling. Keep your eyes open and your hearts focused on God.
!@#$^&*()(*&^$#@#$%^&*()*&%$#@#$%^&*()*&^%$#@#$%^&
I dont know what to do!!! evil cult steal friend!!!!
Word association thread
. Shoot me a PM if you want in. If you meet my moderately rigorous requirements (you've got some skill and don't make a habit of resigning games) I will send you the password. Thanks.
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