apparently a lot of things get away with pretending to be letters these days...

I know. I got this one just yesterday
"Dear Sir," it started.
I won't go into the details but it concluded
"Yours faithfully" and came in an envelope.
What a pretence!

P.S. The laws of thermodynamics also say that you can't even guarantee to lose the way you want to.

What do you mean you can't lose the way you want to? That would be too much like winning.

You don't just lose, you get PwNd like a fat little middle school boy who wears glasses.

"3. You can't get out of the game."

If the Many-Worlds interpretation is true, then you actually cannot get out of the game. Ever. As long as there's the slimmest chance you'll carry on living your conscious continuity will follow those universes in which you survive.

Exhibit A
I rig a belt of explosives around my head attached to a detonator. When I press a button, the spin of an electron is measured. If it's spin up, the belt explodes and me with it. If it's spin down, then nothing happens. In front of a live audience, I press the button. Phew, nothing happens. I press it again. Nothing. I press it again and again and again. Nothing. Of course, it the majority of universes my brains have been blown and I've completely horrified my audience. But in a slim minority of them, I've continued my conscious existence, unaware of the deaths of my others. More importantly, I've proved the Many Worlds interpretation of quantum mechanics and spurred the greatest age of technological advancement in human history.

@ Chrism You will only have proven it in the tiny minority of universes in which you survived, and even in those you have only proven it to yourself. I fear that in countless other universes you will simply demonstrate that people who play online diplomacy are mentally unstable and your actions will lead to countless webdiplomacy protest groups.

I can hear the distant battlecries of Mothers Against Diplomacy as I type... God help us all....

If the many-worlds interpretation is true, suicide bombing is a demoralising profession.

Thermodynamics is like The Game.
1) You can't win the game.
2) You can't not lose the game.
3) You can never stop playing the game.

We all just lost The Game.

those rules also sound like marriage vows

1) you cant win an arguent
2) your paycheck doesnt break even (it all belongs to her)
3) you cant quit because if you do, you simply pay child support

Octavious, but isn't the minimal (relatively) effects of my public death worth it when compared to the massive scientific boost that it would bestow upon the few universes in which I do not die?

More pessimistically, if what I'm saying is true, then we would all be likely doomed to a horrible protracted existence as a maimed and disfigured body. That is, say I try to shoot myself in the head. Now there's an infinitesimal chance that the bullet will simply pass through my head without hitting anything along the way and crash into the wall across the room. However, more likely is that while I'll survive, the bullet will hit just enough of my head to leave me conscious and alive, but in a very much deteriorated state of being. =/