Zaza:
It's a standard experience:
In church. They sing a hymn. For me, A Mighty Fortress is Our God. They sing a line that hits home. For me, "The Prince of Darkness grim, we tremble not for him, his wrath we can endure, for lo his doom is sure." I feel that God loves me, that he is there, etc. Later, a few months later, something good happens. For me, I get a car. I attribute this to God loving me.
The rest of the story is pretty normal too, but less so:
Later, I apply critical thinking skills. I start to think about the nature of knowledge. I conclude no knowledge is possible, only beliefs. I decide that the belief in God, the Christian God anyway, though nice for Christians, is not nice for me, because it means many negative things for my life. A good example: I cannot date or have sex with my girlfriend whom I love. So, yes, I hope there is a God, and I hope he loves me, because that's a nice thought. But I have no idea if it's true, so I don't worry about it.
Now, what would be totally cool (as a story anyway) would be if God killed himself. What a drama!