In Sovient Russia, Russian Reversal reverses you!

*Soviet

Red is dull

Evolution is wrong. (this is a troll thread, right?)

Monkeys evolved from the Bible!

Evolution says primates wrote the Bible.

No, God wrote the bible. Monkees interpreted it.

But the Monkees were a rock band. Monkeys, however, invented God in their own image.

God damn it! Chimpanzees wrote the bible and God interpreted it! Then Joseph Smith found it on golden tablets in Muhammed's tomb in Kansas City!

@Draugnar:
Well, that does account for much of the weirdness of the bible...

I once met an old woman from a gospel church, handing out little leaflets about intelligent design, claiming there was no such thing as evolution. She thrust one at me saying confidently "We come from god, not from monkeys!"

My reply: "And where do monkeys come from?"

The Monkees didn't right their own music, but they were somehow able to write the Bible in ancient Greek. Go figure. Mike Nesmith, aside from being a great fake guitar player, is fluent in a suprising number of ancient languages.

write

read (This is now the word association thread)

Your right, rlumley. The Monkees wrote on papyrus with reeds (proper spelling) dipped in octopus ink direct from his garden in the shade and out came the old testament. Only the original writing was as follows:

In the beginning was silence and void and the God moved across the face of the quiet. So God said 'Let there be Rock and Roll' and there was Rock and Roll and God saw the Rock and Roll and saw that it was good. So he separated the notes from the silence and the beginning and the end were the first song. Then God created The Monkees and The Beetles and The Animals and all the bands of the world and saw that it was good. Finally, he created the Stones and set them apart to rule over all the other bands, but one musician, Ozzy, stood up to God and he cast him out of heaven and into the darkness that was Rock without Roll where Ozzy now rules eternal.

God gave rock and roll to us. He put it in the soul of everyone.
Do you know what you want but don't know for sure?
You might not feel right but be unable to find the cure (look under "Robert Smith" in the telephone directory).
You may well not have money or a fancy car and be tired of wishin on a falling star.
Well, brothers, sisters, fellow rock-fans: you've just got to put your faith in a loud guitar (or in an ordinary guitar attached to a loud amp).
Just remember that it was God that gave rock and roll to you.

Reading (as in the town)

I just wanted to remind everyone this is a rant thread. With that in mind, rock sucks, long live Barry Manilow!!

Barry Manilow is the spawn of Slough. His greatest contribution to world culture was the time in 1976 when he excavated his enormous right nostril live on air. The tapes may have been lost but the memory lives long in those of us who were seconds from Manilow-induced suicide (1976 was a record year for this phenomenon) but whose life regained meaning as Barry reached up to gain the artistic integrity and flair of a juvenile slug just after it had taken one too many lines of pellet.
There is no doubt that if there were a singing contest between Barry (the Manilow) and Barry (the South Walian armpit) then the screech of stolen rubber on pot-holed tarmac would be unanimously declared the victor by such a margin that the only fitting response to the second placed artist would be hanging by piano wire followed by surgical removal from the spacetime continuum.

But you forgot about the other Barry from the 70s: The Barry of the Gibbs.

Lord Barry of Gibbs

eurosceptism is the way forward, mark my words...
i'm british and i want good relations with the other european countries
but i hate the eu

Do you have to be European to be eurosceptic?

I am an Anarcho Pacifist and think that we should Nuc' every single national capitol in the world to help bring peace to the earth.

Pacifism and Nculear weapons. I always thought they were opposite side so fthe same coin. Now Isee they can actually be the same side.

mans greatest creation is an honest god

I didn't realize that we created an honest god... please explain.

I'd like to say that skepticism is the way forward in general... but I really doubt it.

Oh, and... <random label> is far superior to communism and objectivism, both.

I have personally always preffered Existentialism over <random label> and even Naturalism.

*preferred