John Worfon goes down with the Troop Ship. The Black Lectroids don't choose to incinerate Smolensk. He gets the girl

Alanis Morissette is God. And her singing will blow your mind. Literally.

He's on the roof of the hotel all along

He letters in Atheltics, she turns into a smoking hottie, and they leave in a flying car!

She taps her heels together three times and is home

Sean Young is really a man (former kicker), and kidnapped the dolphin as revenge on Dan Marino

A cute little tribe of prehistoric teddybears help Luke to save the Universe. All planets rejoice.


lame...

The damn thing doesn't need a human host... a cat will do just fine.

All the beasties gather in the main lobby of the building but when the humans go to drop the curtain, the sun goes in and it starts to rain, so Billy turns a firehouse on the beastiers and lets the one "electric" beastie trapped in the phone system out into the lobby where the electric beastie end up killing all the other beasties because they have a serious problem with bright lights and, hey, electricity is light after all. (yeah right).

Even though his memories and personality have been implanted in him so that he could infiltrate the rebel group (the good guys) and betray them, he ends up liking who he is now and sticks with the good guys.

Here's one I doubt many will get:

The 'Master' makes the mother and daughter into more of his 'wives', and the father takes the place of Torgo, and now wAtChEs tHe HoUsE wHeN ThE mAsTeR iS aWaY

The castaways never make it off the island, despite all their comical efforts.

Both the older sister and her lover died at the beginning of the war, and the younger sister made everything up about their later lives to make herself feel better.

@dexter. Not *exactly* true. They did make it off in one of the reunion movies but did another cruise (idiots!) and ended up back on the same exact island.

@strat - Manos: The Hands of Fate

@Draugnar, now you've ruined it for me :-)
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The young lady in question is both her sister and her daughter.

He would rather have die a thousand deaths, but he still went to go see Grant

The two hero-bandits die at the end in a blaze of bullets... but the lady lives on to make a lame and thankfully forgettable sequel.

@dexter - there's a reason it tops the Worst Movies of All Time list ;)

The brutal assassinations take place during the baptism of Michael's newborn son. Eventually, after discovering that Connie's husband arranges the hit on Sonny, Clemenza strangles him to death by Micheal's orders. Kay hears from Connie that Michael arranges the hit, but when she asks him if it's true, he answers, "No". Kay, relieved, exits Michael's office into the kitchen... but when she looks back into the office, Michael is being praised by his friends, and as the office door is closed before Kay, she is horrified to discover the Michael is the new Godfather.

The planet he's on is really post-nuclear-holocaust Earth.

I am your mother.

It's people. They're eating people and they thought it was a harmless soy product. The name of the movie should have been a clue.

Soylent Green is people.

holy crap - Draugnar and I just read each other's minds.

His mother's been dead for years... he keeps her body in the attic and dresses in her clothes.

When he forces her to the top of the bell tower, she is spooked by the approach of a shadowy figure and plunges off the tower -- this time, her death is real.

@dexter - I've spent the last 10 minutes deciding which Hitchcock to do, so we were reading minds again!

The boat sinks. He drowns. She never lets go.