"Eliminate the impossible and whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth." -Sherlock Holmes.

"My dear girl there are some things that just aren't done, such as drinking Dom Pérignon '53 above a temperature of 38 degrees Fahrenheit. That's as bad as listening to the Beatles without earmuffs." -James Bond, Agent 007, MI6, HMSS in Goldfinger.

"Opinions are like assholes, everyone has one and most of them stink" - ???

"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail." Ralph Waldo Emerson

If you are quoting James Bond, how about an anti-James Bond quote:
"Shaken, not stirred, will get you cold water with a dash of gin and dry vermouth. The reason you stir it with a special spoon is so not to chip the ice. James is ordering a weak martini and being snooty about it." --Jed Bartlett

There are three types of lies, lies, damn lies, and statistics.

Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can't eat it or hump it, pee on it and walk away.

But in reality, shaking bruises the alcohol, and who said anything about using any ice? I use just a hint of vermouth with vodka from the freezer (no gin) in a chilled shaker without ice and pour into a chilled martini glass.

But back to quotes.

James Bond: My dear, uncooperative Domino.
Domino: How do you know that? How do you know my friends call me Domino?
James Bond: It's on the bracelet on your ankle.
Domino: So... what sharp little eyes you've got.
James Bond: Wait 'til you get to my teeth.

'Why is the dog licking his balls? Because he can.' --George Carlin

"It is our choices that show what we really are, far more than our abilities" - JK

"Sell a man a fish, he eats for a day, teach a man how to fish, you ruin a wonderful business opportunity." - Karl Marx (reportedly)

"We all make choices in life, but in the end our choices make us." -Andrew Ryan

"Necessity is the mother of strange bedfellows"

"If the world didn't suck, we would all fall off."

" A blind man would be glad to see it"

"When I became a man I put away childish things,
like the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up" - C.S. Lewis

"I wish that I knew what I know now when I was younger." --The Faces

"Ode to a small lump of green putty I found in my armpit one midsummer's morning" --Vogon poet

He's tracked me over distances you couldn't even write down. - Larry Niven, The Meddler.
(a distance you couldn't even write down. Think about that for a moment...)

He's tracked me over distances you couldn't even write down. - Larry Niven, The Meddler.
(a distance you couldn't even write down. Think about that for a moment...)

I thought about it, don't find it very profound :P

"Time is the best teacher; unfortunately, it kills all its students" (see my profile)

@DingleberryJones - Ok, try this.
You may have trouble getting permission to Aero-brake or Litho-brake an asteroid on Earth. - James D Nicholl
(I particularly like the implications in the word "Litho-brake")

Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. Terry Pratchett

Time you enjoyed wasting is not wasted time.

Sometimes you win and sometimes you learn.

"........" -Helen Keller

this is not my favorite saying, but may be very useful for certain persons here: "don't speak if u don't know"

is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

He who runs in front or a car gets tired.
He who runs behind a car gets exhausted.