Going back to the comment that opened the thread...
I actually enjoy watching how Martin is re-writing the story for TV. You're right in saying that it's not entirely the same, and right in being frustrated that some story lines that were pleasant in the books are not making it to the screen. That said, I find that Martin is an average writer at best, and his biggest flaw is not to know how to avoid opening cans of worms. Books 4 and 5 open onto way too many stories for the plot to remain as captivating as it was in the earlier books. And while some of the characters are, yes, still quite entertaining, the narrative suffers from it and you can tell Martin is having a hard time getting back on the saddle, so to speak. So in a sense, I appreciate the changes brought to the show because they allow us to focus more on the narrative and the great families. It's not exactly the same story anymore (so your wife is wrong about that --- though, to her credit, the first 2 books are generally well represented, especially the first), but both "works" share the same essence, if you will, and cast different but equally valuable perspectives on the same world.
Had it not been Martin behind the writing of the show, this comment would have likely been quite different... and the show as well! Don't forget that Martin has made his life writing for TV and cinema. He knows what the medium needs to tell a good story.