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Chairman Mao (340 D)
29 Nov 07 UTC
Gunboat Game
I have just opened a public game called Gunboat Game, after reading from dangermouse's post on his game, I would like to try one too.....same old rules....no diplomacy talking inside at all......
please support
3 replies
Open
figlesquidge (2131 D)
17 Nov 07 UTC
The long long story so far - around 200 posts so far!
Long Long ago, when the world was just recovering from the great apocalyptic nightmare that gave rise to the wonderllama metagaming! It was because no one had thought to ask whether wonderllama was an actual llama. Apparently he was. No one cared.
"Who just farted?" said the inspector, as he danced the can-can happily.
Deciding to investigate Rait's high score, which wasn't high, but not reputation was an inspiration was simply stopped, so he decided to murder on the case "wonderllama" being a llama!
Fortunately for him, it turned out that wonderllama was really Kestas in a pretty sun-dress disguised with a big cowboy hat and a satin Noel Coward Cravatte, which was stolen by an angry dwarf that can't count, who sold it for magic beans and a young whipper-snapper came along and bit his sister in law (she enjoyed it) because she was most certainly not a good nun. In fact , she was actually a woman known for her ability to get men to digest thousands of giant seedless cherries that turn purple in the sun.
However, when they were eaten by even bigger cherries, they caused great distress among the ecclesiastical community. This meant that a apocalyptic nightmare was affecting the world, until Bush resigned. So I said:
"Hey what's up?"
"The llama's here"
"Or is he?"
A plane crashed into the White House some victims were found eating other with tartar sauce. Many people thought but most didn't correctly assign poodles to the newly resigned Gorilla and that's why we need to learn to love and be happy! Anyway, tasty teddy bears are always gummy, and full of that special sauce that makes children sometimes violently explode in the most spontaneous and random clothing. Meanwhile, in Vienna, their tarts were caught sniffing the newly discovered crisp mini S and being arrested for flagrant disregard and recklessly ignoring the toxic smell.
Figlesquidge just discovered (I think a Nobel Prize for Literature may be on the corner) Noodlebug can't count.
Someone once said, "Long ago, when the earth was pink. The wonderlama was found drunk whilst driving a stolen pink camper-van into eclectic nightmares that didn't need a banjo to make them terrifying". Suddenly, he abdomen did nothing unexpected, merely digested food.
The wonderllama said, "Strike a light, because I'm bored."
At the same time, a dark illegal poodle cartel, so dark that light got scared and dropped the macrowave converter in the open exhaust port decided Poodle Soup was the best at making no one happy so had fish instead. What a shame, he almost died, missing his next reincarnation and causing a global crisis over the amount of microwave popcorn companies missing poodles.
Alternatively, one could argue that Rabbit McNuggets taste disgusting unless seasoned with Pickled Essence of sassafras, with a hint of rosemary and thyme and family jewels. Once digested, these Rabbit McNuggets make you pregnant with little rabbits that, at age 5, aggressively ferment into Rayman Raving Rabbids, with powers that these days are considered too weak for Wii. In Serbia, people despise rabbit McNuggets & don't have rabbit at all.
Meanwhile, TOgilvie thought that phpdiplomacy was stupid, but it wasn't. Quite the opposite; it really was: poodles, poodles and more poodles: Absurd! Or so he ranted. Now why?
"Because he's a llama", said Gobbledydook, "A llama that can't spit is just a camel."
Of course, that wasn't enough for him to excoriate the Wonderllama's hide. Instead he jumped on the legendary Dangermouse for a little
88 replies
Open
keeper0018 (100 D)
30 Nov 07 UTC
Updating the Adjucator...
Hey everyone-

Has anyone heard anything recently about the updating of the Adjucator? Thanks.
8 replies
Open
Braveheart (2408 D(S))
01 Dec 07 UTC
Joining private games
I've created a private game... but cannot figure out how my friends can join it/link to it... pls help!
0 replies
Open
flashman (2274 D(G))
30 Nov 07 UTC
Join this game: Ghengis...
I am in and waiting for serious players. Low cost because of financial difficulties.

Rait wants to join - but he seems to have gone AWOL.

I have dropped hints band clues for the Password but want to stop the metagamers from gate-crashing.

Use your nod and work this one out:

The Mongols were twice defeated in the Far East: who or what was the 'enemy'?

(one word answer...)
7 replies
Open
VIOLA (1650 D)
30 Nov 07 UTC
The Spanish vol3
New game pot 85, please join it if you are brave players only
2 replies
Open
Rait (10151 D(S))
30 Nov 07 UTC
Anyone into low rollers game?
... as I obviously can't afford any big bets at the moment. So let's say, 5 DC-s? Only decent players.... playing rather for fun that for points?
19 replies
Open
gonzo (128 D)
30 Nov 07 UTC
civil disorder?
How long does it take for a country not to be played before it goes into civil disorder?
1 reply
Open
dangermouse (5551 D)
29 Nov 07 UTC
Prime Example
A prime example of why all losers should get the same point payout at the end of a game.

http://phpdiplomacy.net/board.php?gid=1912
16 replies
Open
skwirL (60 D)
30 Nov 07 UTC
password games...
So I created a password game to try to get some friends to join. However, it skipped through the page talking about how to link them to it too fast for me to read what to do. I link them to the page with the password in the URL or something? Like with a parameter?
i.e. "http://phpdiplomacy.net/board.php?gid=2346&password=whatever"
Plase heelp!


0 replies
Noodlebug (1812 D)
30 Nov 07 UTC
Medium Rollers game
Bet is 200, so not TOO exclusive, although the good news is Rait can't afford to join..!
3 replies
Open
WrathOfGod (100 D)
30 Nov 07 UTC
Game for Beginners. To learn and test your skills.
Games. Scourge and ScourgeII. Join.
0 replies
Open
pitirre (0 DX)
28 Nov 07 UTC
the perfect diplomacy game
it is difficult to get 7 players to play a good diplomacy game but if i get to choose with whom i get to play, here it is the players and the countries they will represent;

england; anibal acevedo vila (the governor of my island. everybody subestimate him just because he is ugly, nerdy looking and kind of delicate ...but always get his way in our little world of politics in PR).

France; me (i tend to do well playing france).

germany; fidel castro (if you ever heard one of his speeches he can go on for 6 hours straight in a speech...just imagine how much diplomacing he can do in a game. very stimulating)

russia; muhammad (it will be interesting to see if he will try to use his past experiences to unite so many tribes in the game).

austria; kissinger (let the master handle this)

italy; cardinal richelieu (another difficult country for a great diplomat).

turkey; bismarck (just to see if he gets nostalgic with austria)

mmmmm, i see myself winning this game with kissinger coming second and england, third.
5 replies
Open
TOgilvie (845 D)
30 Nov 07 UTC
If you don't support me into venice, I'll smartjason you!
Question: If the verb 'to smartjason' was to be included in the next edition of a popular dictionary, what would be the definition? Points for creativity.

My offer:
to smartjason (v): to take a dump in someone else's shoes in a sly, cat-like manner.
0 replies
Open
Budlight (201 D)
23 Nov 07 UTC
Gobbledydook has many accounts!!!
I found at least two, Jabberwocky, Gobbledydook...

More to be found!!!
30 replies
Open
arthurmklo (879 D)
27 Nov 07 UTC
Taking the argument of Smart Jason to a different level
We know he is a multi accounter, and of course there are others who also are multi accounters, but how on Earth that Mr Smart Jason still have the pride to blame (not accuse, since they really are...but have repented) other people for having multi accounters?
I am getting very annoyed by this kind of behaviour (blaming the others committing the same crime as yourself and saying that you are pretty much innocent?!)
Nothing could be done for this sinner now, he is beyond repent. (FUBAR-ed, military slang, check it out)Let him blabber on, and just as Karkand had said “Smart Jason, may thou name ring diplomaticly shameful forever”
5 replies
Open
Wombat (722 D)
29 Nov 07 UTC
Smart Jason has X no. of accts!!!
to mimic his thread about Gobbledydook.. here's one for him.

Smart Jason has many accounts! Emoduke, chairmanmao, ngsuenluen, garvilo princip, budlight, (the one and "only") smart jason, russianroulette...

explain this chimp
2 replies
Open
Chairman Mao (340 D)
27 Nov 07 UTC
New Game "To be happy..."
New Game "To be happy..."
(http://phpdiplomacy.net/board.php?gid=2317)

under password protection, and to solve it, one must find out who said the following phrase:
"A table, a chair, a bowl of fruit and a violin; what else does a man need to be happy?"

format of password: fullname with no space
(e.g. if it is David Beckham, password would be davidbeckham)

hope that quality people may join, and this i think is intelligent enough to keep off the smart kid around here....
13 replies
Open
jk1974 (100 D)
29 Nov 07 UTC
bug in ...
hello guys, take a look at the situation in this game

http://www.phpdiplomacy.net/board.php?gid=2112

we restarted our moves recently after the database slowness, and i think there must be an error, i had to disband my fleet in bulgaria (south coast since i'm italy !!!) instead of retairing it into greece which is free ... that would cost me maybe other two scs...

1 reply
Open
Wombat (722 D)
28 Nov 07 UTC
Join this Game- "Smart Jason Sucks"
This is the game you've been waiting for- a game named after the famous idiot himself.

Bet 95 a nice relatively spicy one.

(Hey Smartjason- prove your worth)
5 replies
Open
Razz (144 D)
29 Nov 07 UTC
Perpetual phase: due now
<a href="http://phpdiplomacy.net/board.php?gid=2155">This game</a> has been stuck for >24 hours. Is it possible to kickstart it?
0 replies
Open
mapleleaf (0 DX)
29 Nov 07 UTC
Canadian Host game is starting in half an hour...
...and we need two more players. Help!
0 replies
Open
Noodlebug (1812 D)
28 Nov 07 UTC
Greatest Diplomacy Player Shortlist
You've all seen how it works on IMDB - each poster adds +1 and -1 to the candidates of their choice, any reaching zero are removed until there is only one left. Normally they start on 10 but for quickness we'll start everyone on 5!

5 Alexander (Macedonian Leader)
5 Bismarck (Prussian Statesman)
5 Caeser (Roman Leader)
5 Fouche (French Revolutionary)
5 Ghenghis Khan (Mongolian Leader)
5 Khalid ibn al-Walīd (Arabic General)
5 Machiavelli (Florentine Statesman)
5 Metternich (Austrian Statesman)
5 Napolean (French Leader)
5 Tallyrand (French Statesman)
97 replies
Open
Piglet (107 D)
28 Nov 07 UTC
Question on giving Convoy Orders.
I'm afraid these are very noob-ish questions, but I've been struggling to work out the answers, and I don't really want to muck it up as it could be relatively game-critical if I do.

So... What is the exact set of orders I need to give (as in, for both for the fleet and the army) in order to convoy an army overseas?

How about for a multiple convoy (convoying an army via two fleets)?

Thanks for bearing with me..
2 replies
Open
Zxylon (0 DX)
29 Nov 07 UTC
Capitalism Sucks
Join the game. No password. 50 Points
0 replies
Open
jjjj (0 D)
26 Nov 07 UTC
Help?
I'm new to the site - how do I join games?
9 replies
Open
RaisedByWolves (116 D)
28 Nov 07 UTC
Seeing other counties' orders.
It is very important to see other countries orders after each turn.

I see that there is a feature-in-development to have all the orders "visualized" on the map whether they were successful or not. Could there also be just an old fashioned list of the other countries' orders after each turn? In addition to being in a format more traditional to digest, it would be probably be easier to implement. Maybe we could even get it sooner.
2 replies
Open
flashman (2274 D(G))
25 Nov 07 UTC
History question: Who could have been the greatest Diplomacy player of all time?
I shall exclude such verbal wizards as Saruman & Wormtongue... I am interested in real people - in as far as we can know much about them.

I am not sure myself how I would vote on this, but I'll start the ball rolling with an easy one and see where this goes:

Let me make a case for France's Charles de Gaulle...

Reduced to having no SCs of his own early in WWII, he fled to England and managed to gain sufficient support to not only get back into France but also lead his own forces there, soon becoming leader of a re-unified France himself... Then, in true Diplomacy style, he spent the rest of his life blocking, frustrating and generally bouncing England out of just about anything going. A true master of the backstab. England still has problems with the EC because of rules and alliances established during the de Gaulle years.

The only blot on his record was his attempt to push the USA out as well. His comment that he wanted all American soldiers out of France (said after the war) was countered brilliantly by the US President who retorted with the now legendary question: "The dead ones as well?"

Okay, he's sitting in pole position: knock him off.
70 replies
Open
El_Perro_Artero (707 D)
23 Nov 07 UTC
Can we help fix this?
"There is a problem with the phpDiplomacy.net database server which is causing slowness and internal server errors." -Kesdas (I think)

This site is currently being hosted by DreamHost Web Hosting.
Maybe it is time to switch to a new host?

Is there anything that we can do to help?
7 replies
Open
Chairman Mao (340 D)
27 Nov 07 UTC
7 days soon gone
Well, for my games, the 7 days extension is almost to an end, with the games just a maximum of 2 days away..........yet i think there might be those who have forgotted the deadline and cannot make their moves in time....so if you know any of them, call them back, its back on business
0 replies
Open
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