uhh just don't breathe
duh

If you are part horse or centaur, your girlfriend should stop complaining.

There exist anti-snoring braces.

Why are you sleeping? There's your first mistake right there.

Thirdly, you can stip asking alot for help.

Alot has enough problems of his own!

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.ie/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html?m=1

I saw this interesting new device for sleep apnea (often associated with snoring): http://www.winxsleepsolution.com/

It's not cheap, but less Skeletor-like. I have no affiliation with this company - just thought the product looked interesting.

Alternately, there's always a tracheotomy: http://www.gettyimages.com/license/517200686

@"Jeff Kuta
If you are part horse or centaur, your girlfriend should stop complaining."

that depends on which part(s). People have been known to die from that kind of thing!

Losing weight helps they say.

Tongue shaving?

How dare one tongue shame

They literally make your tongue smaller so air can flow more freely

I was talking about brainbomb's hippocampus obviously.

Is that like a campus for his hippos? (where hippo means horse not hippopotamus, which i'm lead translates as river horse...)

Or, maybe...

Just use a CPAP

Because breathing while you sleep is more important than worrying about how you you look while neither you nor your girlfriend are conscious.

Ugh is that really the best solution still? Cant I get that chip put in my brain or take some lunesta or something that is an ez fix

Get proper professional medical advice, if you have a problem then you probably have that regardless of whether you sleep alone or with a partner, or partners.
One thing about the "machines with tubes etc", a colleague recently had to get one and use it, & his partner is an experienced Registered Nurse.... Keep the plastic tubes clean...moist & warm places are often fungus friendly

Lose weight (if that's a problem), get surgery or use a CPAP. You don't wanna fuck around with sleep apnea. An acquaintance of mine died pretty recently at 28 because of it. Left behind a wife and kid.

Earplugs

Having read brainbomb's medical history in another thread, this is probably not his problem, but environmental allergies can also make people snore. Get yourself tested (to know what allergens to focus on reducing exposure to) and take allergy medication to improve quality of life with allergies.

^Thank you!

some dialogue from Uncle Buck might be helpful:

Never seen you here before.
I know about everybody.
That's why they call me "Pal."
Buy you a beer?
You must be a college student.
Cheerleader probably.
You look firm.
Give it a push.
That's it.
You like all-terrain vehicles?
I've got a brand-new Bronco
right out in the parking lot. Red.
Want to go for a ride?
If the object of the game were
to get the ball as close to the pins...
without knocking any of them over...
you would be champion of the world.
- Really?
- Really.
My throat hurts.
I can't talk.
I've got a cure for that.

Read more: http://www.springfieldspringfield.co.uk/movie_script.php?movie=uncle-buck

Loosing weight and sleeping sober both helps a lot. The second is easier to do fast and in may also lead to achieving the first in the longer run... :)

Kick her out and then who cares how loud you snore

The fire breathing MemSahib, Her Indoors lying on a sofa eating cake doesn't snore as such, preferring to emit a dull rumble interspersed with flatulence that makes a chap's eyes water.

When the "good woman" indulges in lobster and other seafood for luncheon, then devours Rogan Josh & Beef vindaloo at dinner...snoring is not the issue