Aye that England, she cuts quite a figure
Silly Norway, you're making her snigger!
With both feet in the Sea
And the French to her knee
Her crowns enourmous and getting bigger

Uh. Meter?

The Turkish flag is so red, white, and wavy
As it flies out over the vast Turkish navy
Strikin' out west
In an Ottoman vest
There is more to Turkey than mere gravey

Limericks don't absolutely need meter do they? :)

I'm a bad poet.

Italy is green
Italy has no queen
Italy is very small
Italy shall always fall

They read fne to me. But gravy doesn't have an "e" in it.

oops, "fine"

OK, 00-nothing. You are embarassing the great actor's name with poetry like that. ;-)

There was was a man from Austria.
He lost.

It's a slant rime.

I am going to pelt you with Spaggetti

I would rather be pelted with spaghetti.

Spaggetti is an obscure form of West Tuscan sling fired projectile.

Either that or my spelling sucks today, and Draugnar is watching me too much.

Not so simple is Italian life
In a time of struggle and strife
To fight and have fun?
Turn from the Med and run?
Those Italians, they sound like a fife

Oh the wonders of La Belle France
In both love and war will she dance
With a finger in Spain
To be Germany's bane
The French they put us all in a trance

The Austrian state is somewhat unstable
But surrender!? Now that is a fable
With an Italian in sight
Oh him they can smite
In some things the Austrians are able

How bold is the great German Reich
At the decadent Franch will it strike
Have you heard the call?
As our enemies fall
Those non-Germans can go take a hike

France rhymes with trance but that is irrelevant
I once got to ride my very own elephant
It was in England and the ground was all muddy
Oh shoot! Now I'll have to use the silly word duddy
If not for Russia we would have lost World War 2
Same can be said about the U.S. and Canada too
I am Canadian but my Oma's from Austria
A nice little country which likes to shout Hurah!
I prefer steak over Turkey and Yorkshire Puddings
Careful round Greeks, their losing their footings
Many people say Italy is a great big boot
The people who say that are are less inteligent than a newt
Last but the best is the great mighty Germany
The great country south of the Northern Sea
Someone may think I have had too much wine
But who are they to judge an art so fine?

In dawn, oh-one, a new alliance born,
between two nations set to fight them all -
But yet one wonders if he'll face some scorn,
Perchance he stab his friend that very fall

As hours tick he broods over the panel,
While contemplating his ultimate prize
Should he send that fleet to English Channel?
Tempation wins, and he does finalize.

A bounce! A bounce! Seems neither kept his word,
And press goes out to blame the other man -
But no avail - trust is henceforth blurred,
So Pink and Blue shall battle as they can.

Though each man's lying was justice in his eyes,
'tis Germany that reaps the final prize.

lulzworth... AWESOME!!!!!!!!

Excellent. Its great subject matter that does it.

Unfortunately, 'while contemplating his ultimate prize' is not in proper iambs, which I should've realized but I rushed that in 5 minutes and was not thinking.

I once had an ally named Friendly Sword
Who rarely wrote me back a single word.
I found today
Where his time doth lay
On the forums rhyming like a little turd.

Just kidding Friendly! (But really..) J/k. *cough* ;)

I'm really very sorry for my relative untalkativity. I actually spend alot of my time in that game; but its mostly baiting France, who, sofar as I can tell, possesses NO sense of humour whatsoever.

You're not untalkative. I think I may just find it strange you are not one of those 'over-talkative' types.... Or maybe your setting me up to stab and feel guilty. We will see!

game in progress blah blah blah unethical blah blah blah REAL diplomacy players only play as France blah blah blah

[War] is instinctive. But the instinct can be fought. We're human beings with the blood of a million savage years on our hands! But we can stop it. We can admit that we're killers...but we're not going to kill...today. That's all it takes! Knowing that we're not going to kill...today!
(Captain James T Kirk)

my training game in diplomacy
how will it end, we shall see
my first taste of the game
it seems slightly lame
its been filled with controversy

france an england alliance i suspected
but were they cheaters i didn't expect it
we still do not know without doubt
but then two others were booted out
it seems they've all gone n wrecked it

hmm that was fun

With love, from Austria:)

My allies from both near and far
Please come to rescue me
Do I truly know who my allies are
In this game, Diplomacy?

For autumn past fair Italy
Was neither friend nor foe
But now their fleets are near my sea
To war? I do not know.

And Turkey, why ‘twas just last spring
In battle we did join
Quick death to Russia we did bring
And to them, brought their ruin.

Yet now both to my right and left
The Turks and Romans lie
I think unless I am quite deft
I shall be next to die.

A Monte Python Ode to England (from the French)

I see that I must go to war
But I shall not traverse afar
For enemies be at my door
Looking for the lost Lenore?

That silly little homely Brit
Can be such a limey little git
I shall be forced to crush him yet
For of many wars, I am a vet.

His blood shall run like from a spigot.
‘Cause to the French, he is a bigot.
Pompous, dirty English k-nigh-et.

His mother was a hamster, yes
Smelled of elderberries, or so I’d guess
But now he’s messed up my lovely rhyme
So I shall taunt him a second time.