Uber Church & the Clerical Economy

[MajorMitchell]

It's time to cast off anachronistic clerical business practices and get the Clerical Economy onto a New Groovy Path to Economic Growth.

Too busy to get to a Church for forgiveness of sins and seeking a modern practical time saving solution?
No need to stop sinful behaviours and go through withdrawal symptoms!

Sin away then contact Uber Church for prompt Clerical Services delivered to your location by underpaid spiritual sub contractors

Enquire about the Uber Church Elite Canonical Clerical Services for Clients wanting that extra quality level of Clerical Services.

[Jamiet99uk]

What?

[kingofthepirates]

are there virtual options for those with social anxiety?

[MajorMitchell]

Yes King o' t' Pirates, there are virtual options for 21st century parishioners with social anxieties.
"Make every mobile phone a Church, Mosque or Synagogue" is one of the mottoes of Uber Church

We also have social options for parishioners with virtual anxieties.

It's been tricky adapting a few dozen elite level companion & sex doll robots into a range of prototype AI Clerics, Bishops and Cardinals but remarkably rewarding for our engineering staff.

The cruel modern theological realities demand much more profitable, low cost Clerical service delivery technologies be used and Uber Church leads that pilgrimage to the Promised Land

[MajorMitchell]

Consider the advantages of AI flat screen pizza boxes used by Uber Church in our combination Pizza, Pope & Prayers product range.
Eat the pizza you like and save time by watching and hearing the Pope deliver a cracking sermon on the flat screen on the lid of the pizza box

Or get the Halal meal that comes in a box with a pop up Imam calling the faithful to engage in Jihad to entertain diners of the Islamic faith while they eat.

[brainbomb]

Giant pizzas made on massively oversized eucharist wafers

[Jamiet99uk]

Communion wafer pizza has already been claimed FOR SATAN!

https://www.theprp.com/2014/09/17/news/slayer-get-fitting-pizza-tribute-made-from-crushed-communion-wafers/