Should Unfertilized Salmon Eggs be given protection as personhood

[brainbomb]

If Salmon swim upstream and abandon their unfertilized eggs should those eggs be allowed to own a machine gun? Should those eggs be allowed to buy a bump stock so they can defend themself from evil fishmongers?

[dargorygel]

Especially their daughter, Ella.

You know, Salmon Ella.

[sweetandcool]

I, for one, would relish the opportunity to hunt the new most dangerous game.

[JustAGuyNamedWill]

Where would webdip be without the ramblings of brainbomb in the forums

[kingofthepirates]

If Salmon swim upstream and abandon their unfertilized eggs should those eggs be allowed to own a machine gun? Should those eggs be allowed to buy a bump stock so they can defend themself from evil fishmongers?

depends on the state.

[MajorMitchell]

To what specific "state" do you refer, young whipper-snapper King o' t' Pirates?

The state of the unfertilised salomon eggs?
The state of the waters & environment in which the unfertilised salmon eggs are left?
The state of the machine guns?

Dipbro Brainbomb's state of mind when he first thought of this astounding dilemma & decided to create a thread for discussion of his latest unique intellectual dilemma?
(Might be too difficult to attempt answering, deep thought on this delicato topic may induce insomnia, madness, paroxmytic fits, headaches, increased sexual desires of perverted forms, rashes in grotesque shapes and colourations, new growths of hair in undesirable places and other nauseating effects)

Dabbling in the philosophical ponderings of Dipbro Brainbomb is a dangerous form of play for the unwary and unwise in my opinion.

[learnedSloth]

If Salmon swim upstream and abandon their unfertilized eggs should those eggs be allowed to own a machine gun? Should those eggs be allowed to buy a bump stock so they can defend themself from evil fishmongers?

How would they operate those?

[sweetandcool]

If Salmon swim upstream and abandon their unfertilized eggs should those eggs be allowed to own a machine gun? Should those eggs be allowed to buy a bump stock so they can defend themself from evil fishmongers?

How would they operate those?

Matthew 19:26 tells us:

"With Fish this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."

[learnedSloth]

If Salmon swim upstream and abandon their unfertilized eggs should those eggs be allowed to own a machine gun? Should those eggs be allowed to buy a bump stock so they can defend themself from evil fishmongers?

How would they operate those?

Matthew 19:26 tells us:

"With Fish this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."

If those eggs were meant to bear arms, surely God would have given them hands.

[kingofthepirates]

To what specific "state" do you refer, young whipper-snapper King o' t' Pirates?

The state of the unfertilised salomon eggs?
The state of the waters & environment in which the unfertilised salmon eggs are left?
The state of the machine guns?

Dipbro Brainbomb's state of mind when he first thought of this astounding dilemma & decided to create a thread for discussion of his latest unique intellectual dilemma?
(Might be too difficult to attempt answering, deep thought on this delicato topic may induce insomnia, madness, paroxmytic fits, headaches, increased sexual desires of perverted forms, rashes in grotesque shapes and colourations, new growths of hair in undesirable places and other nauseating effects)

Dabbling in the philosophical ponderings of Dipbro Brainbomb is a dangerous form of play for the unwary and unwise in my opinion.

by state, i was refereeing to which state in the USA (or, upon further consideration, potentially which country or province of some country) this situation takes place in. Due to the differences of opinion within the governments of various countries and states, possession of a machine gun may be illegal, unfeasible, extremely discouraged, perfectly fine, highly recommended, or required.
as for your questions:
1) never have I heard of this salomon creature, is it a recent discovery? what sort of creature is it? is it a featherless biped?
2) generally salmon lay their eggs in freshwater. If it was brackish, I'm afraid of the adverse effects that might have on the development of the fish.
3) Hopefully the machine guns will be unloaded. Gun safety is very important, especially when there can be a lot of guns in very close proximity to a large cluster of unfertilized eggs.
4) It is my summer break, and I am not getting paid enough to figure this out.

[kingofthepirates]

If those eggs were meant to bear arms, surely God would have given them hands.

why would one require hands to bear arms? I can think of several cases where such appendages are not required, and arms may still be bore.