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25 Jun 19 UTC	Spring, 1994: A public message is broadcasted from Mother Russia. The newest president, Vladimir the Impaler, has announced his wish for world peace under vam- united banners, and asks all those who would like to aid him in this endeavor to announce their allegiance to him privately.
25 Jun 19 UTC	Spring, 1994: The new Prime Minister Theresa June has issued a damning statement about the tyrant Vladimir of Russia. According to her the peace announced by the president is one that will only benefit the ruler himself and cause bloodshed that he "will greedily suck up".
25 Jun 19 UTC	Spring, 1994: President Lech Wałęsa of Poland announces that Poland will not be made fun of ever again.
25 Jun 19 UTC	Spring, 1994: The Pharaoh of the new Egyptian Empire declares the lands of Egypt a "Land free of living". The prime minister Not-a-Mummyton adds that such freedom also extends to religious practices. In a recent push to attract more tourists by bringing attention to the heritage of the empire, the employment rates have risen to 100% amongst adults, as unemployed were put to work in the construction of a new monument for this new empire.
25 Jun 19 UTC	Spring, 1994: Pecer Piyyat Nagodre has been elected President of Turkey in a landslide victory, recieving 110% of the vote. In his inaugural speech he remarked how much he loves democracy.
25 Jun 19 UTC	Spring, 1994: His Excellency, Duce of Fashion and Prime Minister of the Sovereign State of Italia Fenito Nottolini has announced to the world that Italy will ban the use, import and sale of of sunglasses and sun hats, in an effort to combat the growing threat of the undead within her borders. In lieu of these accessories, the state has mandated that sun visors have "made a come-back" and are "pretty neat".
25 Jun 19 UTC	Spring, 1994: BREAKING NEWS: A junior member of the cabinet in Berlin has seized control of the Bundestag in an armed coup. The young firebrand, Angela Merkel, has declared herself the Eternal Chancellor and Kaiser of the Fourth Reich. The formidable new despot of Germany told reporters that she would lead her new empire to greatness, and that her reign would last a thousand years. Kaiser Merkel's political opponents are nowhere to be seen. Her spokesman responded by offering the journalists present some rather oddly coloured bratwurst.
25 Jun 19 UTC	Spring, 1994: The Hugeunot Committee of anti-naughtiness in Bordeaux has peacefully taken over the government in Paris without any bloodshed through the use of a revolutionary concept called 'voting' and will hereby announce the following change to the glorious country: Planting plants and then letting them die is now considered sodomy and punishable by guillotine as it is considered wasting the seed of god. The Hugeuot Committee would also like to announce the peaceful take-over of principauté de Monaco with which it merely aims to reuinite the other protestants living in the region into it's non-naughty poitrine.
25 Jun 19 UTC	Autumn, 1994: Newly elected President of Spain, by a majority of 87%, Carles Puigdemont and his new government Puigdemont I, has declared to his supporters that, from this day forward "All of España will be Cataluña" as to "ensure a safe and secure society". The members of the terrorist organization NaySayers will be "hunted down and defeated", according to a spokesperson of Puigdemont.
25 Jun 19 UTC	Autumn, 1994: Turkish National News has revealed that President Nagodre, on behalf of the people of Turkey, has recieved invitation to join the European Union.
25 Jun 19 UTC	Autumn, 1994: An official spokesperson for the newly restyled Reichstag Government has responded to news outlets by acknowledging that the Kaiser believes that the Turkish people are true Europeans, loyal to continental prosperity and democracy, and deserve a place in the European Union.
25 Jun 19 UTC	Autumn, 1994: The Hugeunot Committee would like to know why Italy deems so many innocent German-speaking people as his subjects and would like to inform Italy that if they do not pull their troops out of Switzerland, France will consider this a Human Rights violation and very un-christian. Italy should consider itself warned.
25 Jun 19 UTC	Autumn, 1994: A second great library of Alexandria is being built in Cairo. Instead of books, prime minister Not-a-Mummyton has convinced his divinity the Pharaoh, reincarnation of Osiris himself, to just cram as many SSDs in a server as possible.
25 Jun 19 UTC	Autumn, 1994: Vladimir the Impaler has, in a recent news broadcast, condemned the views and words of Britain's Prime Minister Theresa June. In a dashing speech, he promises that the peace he offers will be like sleeping in a coffin with a friend- incredibly comfortable for all parties involved! The news reporter in the meantime details that the wine offered at his mansion was rather tangy and tasted a little like iron, but it was enough to quench his thirst.
25 Jun 19 UTC	Autumn, 1994: BRITAIN VETOES TURKEY'S ENTRY TO THE EUROPEAN UNION! In an unseen move by the ruling Conservative party the United Kingdom has issued their veto on Turkey joining the European Union, Prime Minister Theresa June said on public broadcast. "President Nagodre is a bad man," she said, "he has ties to president Vladimir and seeks the destabilisation of our proud Union. We cannot allow the cockroaches to infest our wholesome western union. We must make a stand against those who seek our destruction in the east."
25 Jun 19 UTC	Autumn, 1994: BREAKING NEWS: Switzerland's former Federal Council, represented by a balding man draped in Christian iconography, addresses the Hugeunot Committee in an official statement. "To the honorable Hugenot Committee, The troops of the Fatherland have come to our borders with invitation and open arms, so that Switzerland's Italian speaking majority can be united with the people and government of Italy, as mandated by our recent referendum, of which the Swiss people overwhelmingly voted in favor of. We humbly appreciate your support in this misunderstanding, and hope that the anti-naughtiness doctrine of your great country can be a source of unity between the three Great Powers of Europe in the face of an ever-growing undead threat all of our eastern borders. Yours faithfully, the Federal Council of Swiss Italy." Reports of Fenito Nottolini's peaceful arrival in Swiss Italy have flooded the media across the continent, with incredibly cheerful Swiss citizens posing with arriving troops, all wearing sun visors.
26 Jun 19 UTC	Autumn, 1994: Nobody really knows what’s going on in Ukraine. They’re assumed to be Russia #2 or whatever
26 Jun 19 UTC	Autumn, 1994: French agencies start spreading newspapers with photos of people in Switerzerland praying, saying things like "The Swiss don't want the Italian Sin." or "Sun visors are but a ticket straight to hell." It's to be noted that both women and men are all wearing plain khaki clothing with no patterns with not a bit of skin outside of their head and hands revealed.
26 Jun 19 UTC	Autumn, 1994: BREAKING NEWS! A contingent of troops from Munich arrive at the border of Switzerland. The Reichstag announces that it will defend German nationals in the country from any hostilities and bloodshed. The Kaiser will brook no unlawful conflict in the region. Concerned ethnic Germans are seen cheering in open relief at their arrival.
27 Jun 19 UTC	Spring, 1995: BREAKING NEWS! The mysterious, self-proclaimed Pharaoh of Egypt, of wich we conveniently have no images, has issued a statement through Prime Minister Not-a-Mummyton, declaring african lands as Egyptian lands by divine right, and warning to all usurpers to leave egyptian territory to avoid any shameful loss of lives.